"I Wish I Would Have Known:" A Guide for Families Facing Adolescent Eating Disorders  

 

By: Bryn Miller, LPC, CEDS-C, Advanced Certified Therapist in Emotion-Focused Family Therapy (EFFT)

Why Early and Specialized Treatment Matters  

The crucial fact is this: early and specialized treatment involving parents is imperative for successful recovery for adolescents with eating disorders. 

Eating disorders are becoming more common and they are starting younger than ever before. The average onset of eating disorders is currently between 12 and 13 years old (NEDA, 2023).  

Breaking Stereotypes: Eating Disorders and Hidden Struggles 

In my decade of clinical experience, the kids struggling the most are often the ones that seem to have it all together. They can be A-students, juggling 6 AP classes and applying for top tier colleges. They can be star athletes, fielding scholarship opportunities, and balancing multiple sports. They can be uber social, well-liked kids with tons of friends.  

None of this means they aren't struggling. It just means they are struggling in silence. 

Our stereotypes about eating disorders should take part of the blame. While the fallacy that someone needs to "look anorexic" to need help persists, we know that less than 6% of people struggling with an eating disorder are medically underweight (NEDA, 2023). No one can accurately look at a person and make judgements about their health and mental health, and yet we do this all the time.  

The Cost of Delayed Help: Untreated Duration and Long-Term Risks 

Often, adolescents with eating disorders go years without help. In fact, research has estimated that the average duration of untreated eating disorder (DUED) symptoms is roughly 2.5 years for anorexia, 4.4 years for bulimia, and 6 years for binge eating disorder (Austin et al. 2020). By the time someone rings the alarm on the eating disorder, it very likely has already been going on for years.  

Research also points to a crucial window of time within 3 years of symptoms starting during which treatment may be most effective for adolescents (Treasure & Russel, 2011). Delaying treatment means running the risk of eating disorder behaviors becoming more entrenched and treatment getting less and less effective. Clinical experience and robust research indicate that "early intervention is presumed to be the most effective method for preventing a long-standing course" (Kemp et al. 2023, p. 1867).  

In other words, the best plan for recovery is one that starts as soon as possible. 

For teens still in high school, parents have an important, ever closing window of opportunity to provide support. Whether an adolescent wants to leave home for college or is just approaching the magical 18 age, parents have more leverage and access to their loved one while they are still home and a minor.  

When College Complicates Recovery: Unique Triggers and Challenges 

College can be extremely challenging for teens with eating struggles. Late night studying, irregular mealtimes, worries about dining hall germs or just extra walking all over campus can all be triggers for struggles with eating for any adolescent, let alone one with an eating disorder.  

Research published in 2025, also shows that "29.4% (33.2% female vs. 21.9% male) screened positive for an ED, and relative to undergraduates not at risk, were more likely to report problems with academics, faculty, family, partners, and peers, greater isolation/loneliness, and weaker university belongingness, poorer health status, and greater psychological distress" (Fowler & Wareham-Fowler, 2025).   

Since Covid, eating disorder risk on campus is up by 13% (NEDA, 2023). Social anxiety and body image struggles can go hand in hand as teens navigate a new social landscape, and colleges are often ill-equipped to provide specialized and expert care for eating disorders.  

The Power of Early Action: Time Invested Now, Years Saved Later 

What does this all mean for parents?  

Act fast.  

Act early.  

Don't wait to get your child help.  

I know it is scary to get treatment for your child, especially if this means missing school, sports and social activities. You want them to have a life. You want them to succeed. Most of all, you want them to be happy. I get it. I am a parent too, and I can only imagine how hard this decision is and has been for the hundreds of families I have worked with.  

So what do I say to the families I support? 

Give me 3 months now, and I will give you 3 years later.  

6 months of treatment now could save your child, and you, six years of treatment later. 

9 months in high school? Better than 9 years down the road. 

---

EDCare offers FREE, confidential assessments and housing accommodations for those who do no reside near our facilities. We are proudly in-network with most major insurances, including Colorado Medicaid.

To learn more about our program or speak with a member of our compassionate team, please contact the center near you.

---